Gone Sailing
by Bagpipedesaster
Summary: A relaxed Gibbs meets a troubled lady and the NCIS is after a serial rapist. And the capital G might be the clue. Romance Gibbs & other. Chapter 115 up. Please review!
1. Chapter 1

Title: Gone Sailing

Author: Bagpipedesaster

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from the TV series NCIS. Erin and the story are mine tough.

A/N: This is my first FanFic. I started it for a friend who has to stay in hospital for a while

and thought, I might share it with you.

Reading and reviewing (please!), please note that English is not my first language. I owe a big

"thank you" to the fantastic people at the LEO online dictionary of the technical university in

Munich – you guys are awesome!

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs was heading back to the marina after he'd had lunch with a

friend whose boat he was living on at the moment. He still hadn't got used to having so much

time on his hands, although it had been more than eight weeks now, that he had been send

into a three months leave. His superiors figured he needed time to fully recover from the

physical effects of several bullets he had caught and the emotional stress of losing one of his

best agents, a man he had worked with for a long time and had considered a friend. When he

had realized the decision to keep him away from work for a while was final, he had found

himself completely without a clue what do.

He knew, he couldn't stay in his house, although of course he would have loved to spend as

much time as possible working on his boat. He'd be all too close to his office and there was no

way he would be able to get his mind of what they were working on without him. Then this

friend of his had called to ask him whether he would like to boat-sit on his over one hundred

years old sailing schooner. It was a classic boat, a real beauty that Gibbs had sailed on with

his friend before, so he gladly agreed. Now he was spending his time sailing, reading and

working out, and he had to admit that it did him good. Thinking about what he wanted to do

with the rest of the day he noticed there had been an accident, a car lying roof-down in a

trench, smoke and flames coming out from under the hood.

Pulling over and coming to a quick stop he saw someone putting a body down beside two

others. Getting out of the car to grab the first aid kit from the trunk, he called the police and

emergency. Having found what he had looked for he headed towards the wrecked car. The

person he saw before was back and viciously trying to open the driver's door. Coming closer

he realized it was a woman, a tall one, bleeding from a deep cut on her upper arm and several

more bruises, not caring about it at all.

He put down the first aid kit and found a thick branch to use as a lever.

"Let's try it this way"

She looked up, not having noticed someone coming and got the idea of what he was up to in a

split second. She stepped aside to give Gibbs the space he needed to place the lever, grabbed

the door-handle and together they managed to force it open. While Gibbs dragged the driver

out, she had already picked up the first aid kit and headed to where the other victims of the

crash laid.

Arriving with the unconscious driver Gibbs saw that she obviously had pulled three people

out of the car alone - pretty impressive. She was kneeling besides one of the two boys and

putting on clean tissue to cover their wounds.

"You been with them?"

Putting the man down he looked over to her to make sure she was ok.

"No, just came by."

Gibbs' wondering about where her car was, was interrupted by the arrival of the paramedics

and police.

The officer in charge asked Gibbs about what happened and he pointed to the young woman,

standing a bit to the side.

"She was here first. Pulled three of them out on her own."

Gibbs thought he saw her pale a little when noticing the officer coming up to her, but then –

what wonder was it that she was a little shaken after what had happened.

"Hi ma'am, you arrived first?"

She nodded her head, not looking at him.

"Yes Sir."

"Did you see how it happened?"

"No, sorry, I didn't."

"Good job, getting those poor guys out of that wreck. May I see Your ID please?"

She stood silent, motionless and just as the police officer wanted to repeat his request, he got

distract by one of the paramedics asking if they could take the kids to hospital already.

She took the chance and ran. The policeman started after her at once and being in good shape

and her tripping twice, caught her pretty fast.

Gibbs had watched the scene and wondered what was going on. Why would she run? But then

– where was her car? How had she come here?

The Officer came back, pushing her on, keeping one of her arms on her back.

"What's your name, Lady?"

No answer.

"You have a drivers licence, social security card, any form of ID with You?"

A headshake signalled "no".

"Tell me your name then."

"Erin"

It was barely a whisper.

"Last name?"

She slowly shook her head.

"Where do you live?"

No answer.

"Listen. I have to arrest you and put you in jail until we found out who you are if you don't

tell me."

She looked at her feet, motionless. She had long, dark blonde hair, her jeans and shirt were

dirty and despite her athletic features she looked completely lost.

Gibbs felt he had to interfere.

"You don't want to jail someone who's just saved three lives, not caring about getting hurt

herself just because she doesn't carry her ID, do You?"

"So, who are You, Sir?"

"Gibbs. I'm with the NCIS."

He handed the officer his ID.

Having checked it, he addressed Gibbs.

"You know the law then. I just can't let her leave like this. What do you propose?"

"Put her under my supervision, I'll take the responsibility."

"Could get you into deep trouble, if she runs away."

Gibbs didn't really know why he was doing this, he just felt it was the right thing. And he had

always trusted his guts.

"Let's make it her decision."

Erin had heard about NCIS. Naval crime something. Thinking about it, this Gibbs guy looked

like he could have been a marine. What had she gotten into here?

He turned to her. She still hadn't moved an inch.

"It's me or jail. And if you choose to stay with me, you'll have to promise not to get me into

trouble."

At her not answering the officer got a little impatient.

"Want to go to jail?"

"No."

She didn't look up.

"Ok, fine. Mr. Gibbs, You'll have to bring her to my office to have her fingerprints and

picture taken."

"Will do. Can we leave?"

"Go ahead."

Gibbs motioned to Erin to follow him and headed for the car. If she planned on running, she

might as well try now and he would call the deal off.

Erin was thinking about just that. But she knew she wouldn't get far and it would be jail

afterwards. And she would rather die than be locked up. And then, she had given her word.

Not that she had said them, but she felt it was implied in her choice of going with this NCIS

guy.

So she followed Gibbs.

On his way he came by a backpack. He stopped and turned around.

"Yours?"

She nodded and he picked it up.

At the car he held the door open for her and she climbed in. He closed the door and she felt

trapped. What a shitty turn the day had taken. Here she was trapped with a tall man she didn't

know. How much worse could it probably get?


	2. Chapter 2

After he put the backpack in the trunk Gibbs got in the car too.

"Buckle up", he advised her doing so himself.

He could see she was hurting from that cut on her arm as she did. That will have to be taken

care of also, he thought.

"Ok then, let's go leave your fingerprints"

He had sensed her being extremely uncomfortable as soon as he got in the car, and now she

seemed to tense even more.

"It wouldn't be necessary if you had some kind of ID."

No reaction.

"Can anyone be called to confirm who you are?"

He could barely hear her "No".

"Ok, don't worry, you'll be fine."

No further word was spoken until they arrived at the police station some fifteen minutes later.

The procedure went fast and since she had felt that she wouldn't be able to deal with much

more, she had fled into a state where she would function automatically, but nothing from the

outside world could really get through to her. She had done this many times before; it had

kept her from going insane.

In less then twenty minutes they where out of the office and back in the car. When Gibbs was

back in the afternoon traffic he announced that he would take her to the doctors now.

That DID get through to her.

She sat up straight. It definitely did get worse.

"I'm all right. Just need a shower and I'll be fine."

Gibbs took a left turn.

"You got a bad cut on your upper arm and burns and smaller cuts all over. And since I'm

responsible for you I'll have you see a doctor."

He looked at her. She was so tense now he felt her tremble. He knew she was on the edge; he

wanted to make this easier for her.

"We're going to my ex-wife's sister, she's a nice lady, you'll see."

He had called Susan from the police station, to make sure she had time for them.

"I don't want to…"

She sounded almost desperate. Gibbs felt sorry for her, but he knew there was nothing he

could do about it right now.

"I got that. But this is not your decision!"

"Yeah, great", Erin thought, "It's my live but not my decision".

She concentrated on breathing, afraid to pass out. When they reached the doctors place she

had managed to get back to her "nothing-can-touch-me" mood.

After they got off the car, he led her in and was greeted by a white coated woman in her fifties

in the doorway.

"Jethro, good to see you, come in."

"Susan."

They hugged hello.

"And you must be Erin then", she put a hand on Erin's shoulder and led her to the attendance

room." Jethro told me you did great out there."

She turned to Gibbs

"You know where the kitchen is. Go get yourself some coffee."

Gibbs more than gladly did so and sat in the living room, flipping through a newspaper, when

Susan came in. He looked up at her and instantly knew something was seriously wrong.

He put the paper down.

"What?"

"Jeth, who is she?"

"I don't know anything more than you do. She's got no ID. Only gave us her Christian name.

I don't even know if she made that one up. Police wanted to put her in jail until they found out

about her. I thought that would be unfair to do to someone who just put his health and life at

risk helping other people. She's under my supervision until we know who she is. What do you

think how old she is?"

"In her mid thirties, I'd say….."

Her voice trailed of.

"Sue, what did you find? That cut seemed to be pretty deep but it would never bring that look

to your face."

"You know that I'm breaking the rules by telling you, do you?"

He nodded.

"She's been to hell and back Jeth, over and over again. Her back looks like a battleground.

There's all kinds of scars – some seem to come from being bullwhipped, some look like

someone extinct cigarettes on her skin. There's burns like they would be caused by electrodes

used with too high voltage and she has been brand marked with a large capital "G" on her

right shoulder."

Gibbs's eyes narrowed. He could feel anger boiling up in him. But Susan was not finished yet.

"Some of these scars seem to be rather old, more than ten years I'd say, after that it's hard to

tell. Some are pretty new, maybe six month or a little more. Judging from the scars inside her

thighs she's also been raped more than once, not in the last few years though."

She paused and looked at Gibbs who was close to exploding. He wanted to hit something, and

hit it hard. And then he realized that part of her being so tense was because of him.

He exhaled and the aggressions that had built up in him while listening to Susan's report was

substituted by a sad calmness.

"She's scared of me…"

Susan nodded.

"Sure she is. She doesn't know you."

"Maybe someone else should be in charge…."

"I don't think so. I know you, Jeth, and I know that she's perfectly safe with you. And she'll

find out, given enough time."

Gibbs didn't answer, thinking about Susan's words.

"How long is she going to stay with you?" she asked.

"At least until someone found out who she is. But if it was my decision – forever!"

Nobody could be more surprised about what he said, than himself. And thinking about it

again, he knew it was the truth. Not that he could explain it, but he felt like he had just found

a long missing last piece of his lives puzzle.

Susan chose not to comment on that.

"She'll need treatment every day at first. Cleaning and fresh dressing the cut and burn on her

left arm, and I have something to make her back feel a little better. Do you want to bring her

in everyday or would you rather do that yourself – might be a way to get her used to you

being around."

"Yeah, I guess it would. Just doesn't seem fair, does it?"

"Live is not always fair Jethro, and you know that damn well. Of course it will scare her, but

you scare her for the right reason. And if she's going to stay with you for a while, things will

be a lot easier for her once she found out she can trust you."

"I guess you're right. Ok then, I'll do it."

"I'll call you in and show you, what needs to be done."

"I'll wait."

Susan went back to Erin who was sitting on the stretcher just like she was when Susan had

left her. Erin had felt paralyzed from the moment Susan first looked at her back. She had

always been careful not to let anybody know. She didn't want to have to explain, she didn't

want to show how easily she could be made a victim and most of all she didn't want to think

about it. Not until it was time to go again. But of course she did, every day, every night.

Susan walked up to her and sat on the stretcher beside her.

"It's a good thing you'll be staying with Jethro. As long as you're with him, nobody will have

the slightest chance to hurt you."

No reaction on Erin's side.

"I had to tell him."

She had thought that Erin would get upset, disapproving of her telling her secret, but it was

worse. She didn't seem to mind at all.

"Hey, don't give up now. You've survived so much. I suppose you didn't want anybody to

find out for good reason, but I assure you that neither one of us will take advantage of what

we know. It would have been pretty hard to keep your secret living on that boat, and Jeth will

have to tend your wounds."

When she realized that she wouldn't get a reaction, she got up.

"Put on your t-shirt. I'll call Jethro in to show him what he has to do."

Erin put on her t-shirt. She was absolutely quiet now. She had turned off her feelings

completely. She watched the scenery like she was no part of it. She wouldn't let anybody

come close other than physical, she would see how it was to stay on that boat with Gibbs –

not that she had a choice. And if he'd make only one false move, she'd feel free to break her

promise and get away.

She didn't look up when Gibbs entered the room. Susan had put all kinds of bottles and

bandages on the stretcher beside her.

She sat on a chair right in front of her. Gibbs standing right behind her. Erin could feel him

look at her; he hadn't said a word so far.

Susan who had cleaned the burn on her left arm before sprayed something on it, covered it

and tied the cover with medical tape. Then she rinsed the cut, gently dried it and dressed it

too. It did hurt, not too much, not that Erin cared. She didn't feel anything – this was easy for

her. Susan explained what she did to Gibbs who stood and watched. This was no problem for

him.

"You with me so far?"

Susan asked.

"Sure. You have to supply me with all this stuff I need."

"I will. Now Erin, please lay down."

No! Erin screamed. Nobody heard it; nobody would see any reaction on her side. But the

scream inside her was so loud, so terrifying that she felt the urge to press her hands to her ears

to cut that sound off. Of course she didn't.

Susan gently put her hand on Erin's knee.

"You'll be ok. Just lay down, so we can have a look at your back."

As a reaction she and Gibbs noticed Erin starting to gently rock her upper body back and

forth. Gibbs had seen that before. This was not going well.


	3. Chapter 3

Susan turned and looked at him, not really knowing what to do next.

Gibbs put both hands on the back rest of the chair.

"Erin, I'll give you one more chance to go over your decision. But if you still prefer staying

with me over going to jail, then you do what Susan asked you to. None of us takes pleasure in

scaring you, but this has to be done."

He spoke matter-of-factly, keeping his voice down.

Erin very slowly lay back and put her legs on the stretcher too.

Susan stood up.

"Turn around, sweat."

Erin did and tried to lock the world out of her mind. When Susan gently pulled up her t-shirt,

Gibbs felt like his heart would stop to beat. Susan's description hadn't prepared him for what

he saw. Somebody really had taken an effort in causing damage. He could literally feel the

pain she must have been going through. Then Susan exposed the "G" that she had been

branded with. He swallowed down the curse that formed on his lips, knowing that any

outbreak of his would scare her even more.

Susan pointed out two really thick scars.

"Those and the "G" must be giving her a hard time moving", she said.

"I'll give you something to massage into these scars to soften up the tissue."

"Am I going to hurt her?"

Gibbs managed to keep his voice on a neutral level.

"At first maybe a little. But it will soon start to feel much better for her."

She pulled the t-shirt down again.

"You can get up now."

While Erin sat up Susan turned to Gibbs.

"You best take care of her arm after she showered. And treat her back once a day. I want to

see her back in five days, but if anything starts looking suspicious, come in any time you

want."

"Ok, thank you Sue."

"I'll get you what you need till Thursday."

While Susan packed everything needed, Gibbs watched Erin put her shirt back on. She was

calm, her face showing no emotions at all. He had always felt uneasy in the presence of a

crying woman; now he wished she would. This was so much worse.

The drive to the boat was spent in silence. Having parked the car, Gibbs picked up Erin's

backpack and they went to the boat. Despite her being seriously worried about being alone

with Gibbs, she had to admire the beauty of the old vessel. She loved boats; one of her

favourite jobs was to work as a crew on a sailing boat. And this one was high class. Given

different circumstances she would have been looking forward to this.

Gibbs gave her a quick tour of the boat, showing her the cabin in the bow, where she would

be sleeping.

He tried not get too close, to give her room, which wasn't easy to do in the restricted space of

the boat.

Back in the cockpit he looked at her directly for the first time since they'd left the doctor.

She still seemed emotionless and Gibbs could only guess how she felt.

"Want to go shower?"

She nodded her head.

"Ok, I'll walk you up to the club-house to get you introduced and supply you with a key-card

for the facilities. You'll get a towel up there; do you have everything else you need?"

Instead of answering she picked up her backpack and stepped off the boat.

The club-house was built and furnished old-fashioned. It looked like money – plenty of

money. She was not too surprised about this though. There had been some pretty expensive

toys in the marina as far as she had seen by now. During her working as crew on several

boats, she had been in clubs like this one before. She had always liked the kind of "British"

atmosphere, all the boat models, paintings, high polished dark wood, the classic art of

understatement.

Gibbs was standing at the counter, talking to a clerk. He having turned his back to her she

dared a closer look. He was tall. She could see he worked out. He had silvery hair, military

hair-cut. She guessed him to be somewhere in his late forties. He had an air of authority

around him. She depended highly on the ability to judge people on first impression and she

knew instinctively that he was used to his orders being followed without asking.

If he was the skipper of a boat she was working on, she would have liked him.

He turned around and walked up to her and she looked down at the floor again.

He handed her a key-card, a towel and a cotton bag.

"Leave your laundry at the counter, when you're done. They'll have it cleaned and they'll

bring it back to the boat. This club is full service."

Then he showed her where the ladies washroom was. Outside the door he stopped and pointed

at the bandages on her arm. "Need help getting them off?"

She shook her head.

"Ok then. I'm back on the boat. You'll find the way, will you?"

"Yes Sir."

She was barely to be heard.

Before he could tell her how much he disliked being addressed as "Sir", she had entered the

washroom.

Standing in the shower and enjoying the warm water on her body, she wondered about the

fact that Gibbs trusted her to come back to the boat. Well, maybe he didn't. Maybe he'd be

somewhere outside observing the club. Maybe this was a test. She would go back to the boat.

If she did a few times, he might stop observing her and it would be easier to get away once

she felt she had to, or once Ben demanded to see her.

She turned the shower off, dried herself using toilet paper for the area around that cut on her

upper arm that had started to bleed again. She didn't want to stain the towel. For the same

reason she taped a piece of clean cloth she took from a small first aid kit she always carried

with her, over the cut. She didn't carry to many spare clothes, so better keep them clean.

Then she put the dirty clothes in the bag Gibbs had given her. It carried a name tag that read

"Morning Glory".

"Must be the boats name", she thought.

She left the bag at the counter and headed back to the boat. She didn't see Gibbs anywhere

around, but then – he was with the NCIS. No way she would see him if he didn't want to be

seen. The nearer she got to the boat, the slower she went. She didn't feel ready to face Gibbs,

she never would. And he would want to dress her wounds, meaning he would come real close.

He would touch her. She felt sick. She stopped for a moment to steady herself before she

stepped on board. Gibbs had watched her approach through the window over the pantry. He

saw her stop, hesitating for a moment, then straightening herself up and moving on.

"Brave girl", he thought. He was glad she came back out of her free will. He had made his

mind up on not constricting her freedom to move in any way. If she wanted to get away, he

would let her. He would never be able to win her trust by holding her as a prisoner. He would

deal with the consequences rather than waste the chance he hoped he had.

She had stepped on board by now and he motioned her to come inside.

"Feeling better?" he asked pointing at the birth beside the navigation table.

"Sit down there."

She nodded a "Yes" and sat down where he'd asked her to.

Gibbs got the bag with the medical stuff Susan had given him and took out, what he needed.

"Put your arm on that table," he said gently.

She did. He cleaned and dressed her wounds. Erin had to concentrate on breathing. He was far

too close, treating her with steady hands, careful as if trying not to hurt her. She could feel his

eyes on her all the time.

He knew he hurt her, but she didn't even tense. That told him a lot about her being used to

dealing with pain. He didn't like it, although it was no surprise. When he was finished, he sat

down on the berth opposite of hers.

"You ok?"

"Yes Sir." She didn't look up but took her arm from the table, putting it in her lap.

"Could you try and call me something other than "Sir"? Not even my subordinates at the

office do. Call me Jethro or Gibbs, what ever, but please don't "Sir" me, will you?"

She didn't react, so he got up and stepped to the pantry.

"Let's sit outside and have something to eat. You must be hungry."

She wasn't, but when he filled two bowls with soup, she got up, took the bowl he handed her

and went up the hatchway into the cockpit. She put her bowl down at the table and sat on one

of the benches.

Gibbs sat down opposite of her. He started to eat and was glad to see she did too. After few

minutes had passed he put his spoon down.

"Can I ask you a few questions?"

She didn't say "no", so he continued.

"Are they going to find a match, checking your fingerprints?"

He spoke quietly and friendly. He didn't want this to appear to be an interrogation.

She put down her spoon too.

"No."

"And Erin really is your Christian name?"

"Yes."

"Your last name…can't you tell me or do you just not want to?"

She seemed to be thinking about it for a moment.

"I can't."

"How comes?"

"I don't know it."

He was surprised. But his instincts told him what she said was true.

"You don't know your last name?" he inquired.

"No."

So you never had any kind of ID?"

"No."

"Birth certificate?"

She fell back into silence.

Gibbs blamed himself for pushing too hard.

"Hey, look. I just want to help. What are your parent's names?"

"I don't know who my parents are."

"Who brought you up then?"

"Stayed with different people."

Gibbs started to get an idea of what kind of life she'd had until now.

"Where do you live now?"

"I'm moving around."

"You have to earn some money."

"I take all kinds of jobs."

"Like what?"

"All kinds of things."

"So you're telling me that you never had a last name, you live nowhere, go from job to job,

always ready to leave, is that right?"

She didn't answer. She didn't have to. He knew it was the truth.

He leaned back, never taking his eyes off her.

"I changed my mind about making you promise not to run away. If you want to leave, you can

– any time. But I really want you to stay. I think you need a rest from all this moving around.

And I can help you get the papers you need."

She couldn't believe what she heard. Did he really tell her she could go? She felt like a bird

released. Suddenly it was so much easier to breathe. And what did he say about her getting an

ID? He wanted to help her? He wanted her to stay and he wanted to help her. She couldn't

believe it. But then – Gibbs didn't seem like someone who didn't mean what he said.

Gibbs sat silently, watching her think about what he had offered.

Erin's first thought had been to just get up and get away. But then, it would be much easier if

she had proper ID. And yes, she needed a rest. But why would he offer to help her.

She knew where she would find the answer. She didn't want to, but something made her look

up.

Their eyes met for the first time. Nobody had ever looked at her the way Gibbs did. She

wanted to look away, but she couldn't. His eyes promised something she couldn't name.

Somehow his thoughts seemed to bypass her brain and connect directly to her sub conscience.

She forced herself to break the eye contact and end that connection. She needed to have full

control to make sure she was safe. But something had reached her. Deep inside she felt a tiny

glimpse of hope.

Gibbs didn't want to loose her attention.

"How about trying for a while; see how this works out? If you think you're not up to it you

can still decide on leaving in a few days."

She heard herself agree. She wasn't convinced, but maybe it was worth a try.

They heard a canon shot and Gibbs stood up to take in the flag. Erin knew this happened

every night at sundown.

She got up too, took the bowls and spoons to the pantry inside and rinsed and dried them. She

put them back into the cabinet and went back outside again to hang the towel over the railing.

Gibbs wondered whether she had been on boats before. She moved easily in this special

environment and hanging things on the railing to dry was a typical sailor's thing to do.

When she was finished, Erin stood a while, watching the scenery.

Gibbs figured she didn't know what to do next. He knew he couldn't expect her to get used to

the new situation this fast.

"Do you play chess?" he asked.

Erin turned his way, not looking directly at him though.

"No, I don't."

"Want to learn?"

"Yeah, why not."

He got the board and they spent the next two hours playing. She caught on really fast and was

obviously able to think of many possible moves and their consequences pretty fast.

He had suspected, she was smart, and after he'd had the chance to look in her eyes he knew

for sure.

She really concentrated on learning to play but he saw that she was aware of what he was

doing every second.

"It's getting late. Let's call it a day and get ready to get some sleep."

They packed up the game.

On their way back from the day's final visit to the club-house, walking along besides Gibbs,

Erin suddenly could no longer fight back her fear of what was coming next.

It hit her full force, knocked the air out of her. She was hardly able to walk.

Gibbs noticed her pale and slow her steps. He knew immediately, what was going on.

Tbc?


	4. Chapter 4

He stopped and turned to her.

"I whish I could do anything to make this easier for you…but I can't, right?"

She shook her head.

"I'm scared too, you know. I don't want to hurt you, and Susan said I might."

Erin took a deep breath. She didn't want to cause problems.

"It's okay. I can deal with a little pain."

"I know you can. But you shouldn't have to. You've had more than enough if it, in my

opinion."

She didn't comment on that, but started walking towards the "Morning Glory" again.

Since she had decided she would stay for a while and she didn't feel she had the slightest

chance to convince Gibbs to forget about the matter, she might as well go for it.

Gibbs again had to give her credit for her courage.

He started walking after her.

"I guess it's not pain that bothers you so much…"

She stopped again. How could he know?

"I understand that in your past life it was vital for you, never to trust anyone. And judging

from what you told me after dinner I suppose you never did. You see, trust is not something

we're born with – we have to learn it. And that takes a while."

She didn't move, didn't look up, but he knew she listened to him.

"Try to see it from a logical point of view. Given you don't consider me to be a liar, you

know that I want you to stay. Do you really think I'd be stupid enough to take advantage of

you then?"

Erin thought about that for a moment. No, she didn't think he was a liar. So far he hadn't tried

to trick her. She believed that he wanted her to stay and for some reason she couldn't

name yet, she wanted to stay too.

"I guess not."

"I guess you're right. Can we go now? "

"Okay."

Back on the boat when she was on the way to her cabin he said:

"Leave a t-shirt on. I'll be with you in five minutes."

She changed and used the remaining time to get in her "do-whatever-you-want-to-me" mood.

Meanwhile Gibbs sat on the birth on the starboard side in the salon. He wasn't looking

forward to his next task. He admired her for her strength. Even in the current situation, being

all new and frightening for her, she was really handling herself well. He could hardly imagine

what she would be like relaxed and feeling safe.

When Gibbs entered the cabin after having knocked on the door, he found her resting on her

tummy.

He sat beside her and gently laid his hand on her back, leaving her the protection of the t-shirt

at his first contact.

She held her breath.

He started to move his hand now, without applying any pressure.

She whished he would talk to her and make it easier to keep her mind on the present and not

drift back into the black holes of her past.

"Hey, don't forget to breathe," he softly reminded her.

She took a deep breath.

"That's better. I'm going to push that t-shirt up now, ok?"

He didn't really expect her to answer and slowly did what he had told her.

He needed all his skill in self-control to remain relaxed when confronted with the marks her

life had left on her, again.

He kept his voice low.

"Okay now, since I don't know how this will feel for you, please tell me if you want me to

stop."

He poured some of the liniment Susan had provided him with, into his hand and started to

gently massage it into her scars.

A voice inside her head said "stop", but she didn't let it be heard. She didn't react at all. He

treated her with so much care, there was hardly any pain.

"Let's make this a general rule: You say stop and I'll stop. Applicable in every possible

situation."

He poured some more liniment and worked his way up to the brand.

"Why does it have to be a "G", for God's sake?" he thought.

"I hope, that one day you can tell me, who did that."

When he was finished he pulled the t-shirt back down. He covered her with her blanket.

"Rest now. See you tomorrow."

With that, he got up and left the cabin.

Next morning, after a sleepless night, she left her cabin when she heard Gibbs handling mugs

in the pantry.

She climbed up the stairs into the cockpit,

"Good morning" Gibbs said with a smile, "How do you feel?"

She had not wanted to, but their eyes met for a second, before she looked away.

"I'm fine, thanks."

She had never seen eyes like his before. They talked to her. She just didn't know the

language.

"I'm on my way to the club-house, want to join me?"

"Sure."

She already carried everything she needed.

Back on the boat, they had coffee and Gibbs asked her what she wanted for breakfast.

"Nothing", she replied, "I've never been able to eat in the morning."

So he just got a bowl of cereals for himself and sat in the cockpit to eat.

It was almost 0800 now. Erin opened one of the closets under the benches and got the flag

out.

"Have you been on boats before?" Gibbs asked, already knowing the answer now. How else

would she know you had to fly the flag from 8am till sundown?

"Yes, occasionally."

He nodded to the stern staff.

While Erin fastened the flag, he took his bowl down to the pantry.

Back in the cockpit he addressed Erin.

"Time for boat maintenance routine now."

She opened the compartment, the flag had been in again, took out the scrubber and a bucket

with a line tied to it and turned to Gibbs.

"You want to clean the deck?" he asked her.

It came to her mind that maybe she had better waited for him to tell her what he wanted her

do. She shouldn't have worried.

"Go ahead."

While fastening a cleat that had come loose, he watched how skilful Erin handled the "bucket

on the leash".

"So much for 'occasionally' ", he thought.

They worked on small repair jobs for the next hours, Erin helping where ever she could. She

was careful to never get in his way, never get too close.

Gibbs noticed that she was good working with her hands and handling tools, which he liked a

lot. And that she seemed to enjoy it, which he liked even more.

Finished, they stowed away the tools.

"Let's go up to the club, grab some sandwiches and something to drink and find us a nice

place for a lunch-break."

After picking up the sandwiches, coffee for Gibbs and a coke for Erin they went over to the

Lighthouse at the end of the pier.

"We can sit and eat over there." Gibbs motioned towards a small stone wall.

They did without much talking.

When they were finished Gibbs looked at Erin.

"I had planned to go to the gym this afternoon to work out and get back in shape. But I don't

have to. I'm not sure whether I want to leave you here alone."

Erin couldn't help but think that he seemed to be in pretty good shape already. And she saw

the chance to take a nap, while he was gone – if he would go.

"I'll be fine. I'll just read a book or watch the boats, no need to worry."

She sounded like she meant what she said and he didn't want to be overprotective.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, absolutely."

"Okay then, let's get back to the boat for me to pick my stuff up and get going, so I won't be

back too late."

Having arrived on the "Morning Glory", he pulled out a card and put it on the navigation

table.

"My cell-phone number is on here. You can call me any time and I'll be back in like fifteen

minutes."

"Will do." Erin said, knowing she never would.

"If for any reason you want to leave the boat, please lock it and leave the key at the counter in

the club-house."

He noticed the knot that formed in his stomach, when he thought about her maybe not being

here anymore, when he came back. But then – he had told her she could leave when ever she

wanted to, and he always kept his promises.

She knew exactly what was on his mind. He had been so friendly towards her; she felt she

should give something in return.

"I'll be here," she said with the indication of a smile on her face and in her voice.

Instead of giving in to his intension of going over to her and giving her a hug he grabbed his

bag and stepped off the boat.

"See you in a few hours then."

"Bye!"

Erin watched him until he got out of sight.

Seated in his car, Gibbs sat quiet for a while, wondering about what was going on with him.

How could she have grown to be so important to him in just two days? Of course he wanted to

help her; he had always loved to help and care for people. But, being honest to himself, he had

to admit that this was much more. Even the word "love" entered his mind, when thinking

about Erin. And that was not him. It was not a Gibbs thing to head-over-heals fall in love. But

if it wasn't, then why did it feel so right? Why did it feel so god damn good?

Back on the boat, Erin didn't waste any time. She was in her berth as soon as Gibbs was out

of sight. Over the years, she had trained herself to wake up every hour, so that she wouldn't

enter the R.E.M. phase of sleep. This way she could avoid the worst dreams. After her third

turn of sleep, she got up. She didn't want to let Gibbs catch her asleep.

She went up to the club-house to go to the bathroom and maybe pick up a book from the

library.

When Gibbs came back, he stepped on board and didn't see Erin. He didn't want to startle her

by appearing without a warning.

"Erin?"

No answer.

Starting to worry he went down the hatchway, quickly looked around, checked Erin's cabin

and had to realize she wasn't there.

"She wouldn't do that," he reassured himself, "She wouldn't leave without a word, especially

not after promising to be here."

He got out into the cockpit again and saw her walking down the pier. His heart leaped.

Erin noticed the expression on his face from a distance.

Having arrived at the boat she said:

"I told you I'd be here."

"I know. I'm sorry. It's just that I…"

He caught himself before confessing something that she wouldn't be able to put up with yet.

"Want to go for a walk and look at the boats?" he asked instead.

Erin had sensed something going on and was glad to be back on safer ground.

"Yes, sure."

They took their time strolling along the different piers discussing the boats they came by.

Both of them preferred sailing boats over motor boats, both especially liked the old traditional

ones. Erin was still careful not to get too close to Gibbs, but he felt she was not as tense as she

had been in his presence yesterday or even in the morning.

He thought of taking the chance and asking her all the questions about her past that he needed

to have answered. He knew he could make her talk. But other than usual, getting the

information he wanted was only a small piece of the whole cake this time.

„Don't push her," he reminded himself, "You'll know when the time is right."

Back on the boat, he made a suggestion.

"Why don't you go shower, while I cook up some spaghetti? I can take care of your arm when

you're back; we'll eat and could have another round of chess afterwards. What do you think?"

"Sounds good."

On her way back from the club she realized that she didn't bother too much about Gibbs

tending her arm. Of course he would be far too close, but she had been able to handle it

yesterday, and today wouldn't be worse.

When he had dressed her wounds, they ate and while Erin was doing the dishes he set up the

game.

After four games, of which she won the last, she felt his gaze on her.

He didn't say anything though, so she looked up to find out, what was going on. Her eyes

met his and she could see he was worried about something.

She looked back down on the board again, picked up a chessman, thoroughly examining it.

"Is it going to be as hard for you today, as it was yesterday?" he softly asked, concern

showing in his voice.

She shrugged her shoulders.

"Look", he slowly reached out and covered her hand with his. She stopped breathing.

"There is no way I'll ever lay my hands on you with the intension to hurt you."


	5. Chapter 5

Something in his voice made her look at him again. She had to be dreaming. Nobody would

ever promise her, what his eyes did. She swallowed hard, fighting back the tears that started to

well up in her eyes. What did he do to her? She had to leave her feelings locked up deep

inside of her to remain safe. She wanted to pull her hand out from under his, but she couldn't

move. She was relieved when he took his away.

"Give your self time", he said with a soothing voice, "I know I can't force you to trust me –

this is just an invitation."

He sat silent for a while to give her the chance to recollect her self. He was sorry he made her

feel uneasy again, but then, he also felt he had to push the limits.

He started to pack up the game and Erin, glad he had obviously closed the subject helped him.

She followed him down the hatchway. Stowing the chessboard away he turned to her.

"Erin, I didn't mean to confuse you. And I don't want to push you, for sure. I'm just trying to

find a way to help you."

She wanted to ask him why, but didn't dare to, so she headed for her cabin.

"I'll be with you in a moment", he said.

As he had the night before, he talked her through the procedure. Erin laid motionless, holding

on to his voice.

He wondered if she'd ever experienced being touched as pleasant. He suspected that he did

more then just to treat her back. He might as well be introducing her to a whole new world.

He hoped he did. He wanted to tell her that she was not alone anymore, that he would do

anything he could to help her get over her past life. That he wanted to hug her and hold her

and tell her that he loved her. Again he was caught by surprise about the clarity of his

feelings. Telling her was not an option right now though, of course.

So he tried to talk to her with his hands, caressing her rather than giving a massage.

Erin had tried to separate her mind from her body. But obviously she hadn't been able to do

so completely. She could feel his hands on her back, and was surprised by the absence of

pain. Long after he had already left her cabin, she still tried to figure out, what it had felt like.

At least she could answer that question he had asked before now: No, it hadn't been as hard

for her as it had been yesterday.

She took two of her one-hour-naps and after that, afraid to drift too far into sleep, sat up to

meditate. She wasn't able to empty her mind though, had too much to think about - Gibbs

above all. She didn't really know what to think about him. He was friendly, patient,

considerate and easy-going. He was too good to be true. But he'd make a good character in

her daydreams. She wondered why he didn't work. Well, maybe he did – maybe he was

undercover. But then he had said something about getting back in shape. Maybe he was on a

leave for some reason.

She felt restless and in need of fresh air. She put on a pair of jeans and a sweater. Not

wanting to wake Gibbs, she opened the hatch above her and climbed out.

She sat down on the deck, leaned on to the railing and let her feet hang over the ship's side.

She savoured the smell of the ocean and listened to the seagull's raspy greeting the first

indication of the new day.

The other boats were only faint shadows and the sound of the shrouds and halyards clapping

against wooden or metal masts promised a nice breeze for a perfect sailing day.

Before long she could hear the unique sound of the fishing cutter's one-cylinder diesel

engines.

As she had many times before, she felt that a morning like this one was making up for so

much. She was completely at one with herself. If life would be like this all the time, she'd

love it.

She heard a noise from the cockpit. Gibbs was up early too. He stood and stretched. Taking

his first look around he saw Erin sit at the bow. Erin couldn't help but look at him when he

approached her. He was barefooted, dressed in jeans and a loose fitting white t-shirt, his hair

still ruffled and Erin caught herself thinking he looked really good.

He sat down beside her, letting his feet hang over the side too.

She noticed something had changed about her feelings on him being so close. She still felt

uneasy and intimidated, but there was something new underneath it, tingling and causing a

strange sensation in her tummy.

"Good morning, you're up early", he said with a smile.

"I needed some air. And I love to see the day awake."

"One more thing we have in common", he thought.

"Yeah, me too."

They sat in silence until the sun had come up over the Chesapeake Bay.

He touched her right foot with his left. Before she could even think about it, he turned to her

with a broad smile.

"Wanna go sailing?"

"Can we really?"

He saw her smile at him for the first time, and knew he would do anything to make that

happen again as often as possible.

"You bet we can. Let's go, get ready."

They went to the bathrooms in the club-house and then picked up sandwiches, a thermos flask

full of coffee and a six-pack of coke to provide them for the day.

Back on the boat, Gibbs went inside to securely stow away everything that could fall around.

Erin unleashed the tarpaulin covering the mainsail, took it of and neatly folded it into a small

square. Since she didn't know where it had to be stowed, she put it on a bench in the cockpit.

Then she readied the mainsheet.

Gibbs stepping out again put the canvas away and looked at Erin.

"Can you cast us off?"

She stepped onto the footbridge and went to the dock line aft. Gibbs couldn't deny himself a

satisfied smile. She was a sailor, no doubt about it. She knew the line at the stern had to be

released first, so he could back the vessel out of the berth. He started the engines and

motioned to Erin to untack the line. Erin did and threw the end of it on board. Then she went

to the bow, waiting for Gibbs' command.

"Cast off!"

She did and climbed aboard, pushing the bow away from the bridge with her foot.

While Gibbs manoeuvred the boat out of the harbour, Erin coiled up the bow- and spring line

and took in the fenders that were hanging outside the boat to protect it from any damage

caused by contact with the bridge.

Once the deck was cleared and they were well out of the harbour Erin went to the main mast.

As Gibbs nodded his "ok" she hoisted the sail, using the winch for the last part. She tied the

halyard to the cleat and neatly coiled up the remaining rope.

When Gibbs was sailing alone he didn't use all sails. It would be too difficult to handle a boat

this size under full sail alone.

But today they would let her fly!

He turned off the engine. This always was special. The moment a sailboat came to live. No

sound but the wind caught in the sails and the waves caressing the hull.

Erin gave him a questioning look.

"Foresails are under the second hatch. Will you manage?"

"Yes".

She pulled out two sails and hitched the staysail and jib to their stays. Then she fastened the

halyards and went back to the cockpit to get the sheets.

Gibbs had tied the tiller so he could hoist the mizzen. He had already taken out two sheets that

Erin laid out and tied to the foresails. Gibbs steered the boats' nose into the wind to make it

easier to hoist them. Erin did and Gibbs took the slack out of the sheets, properly positioning

the sails. The "Morning Glory" picked up speed fast.

Erin came back to the cockpit.

Gibbs gave her a warm, satisfied smile.

"Good job, sailor", he said.

"Thanks skipper", she returned.

Gibbs couldn't remember when he had felt this good the last time.

"I like that."

Erin didn't understand what he was talking about.

"I like you calling me 'skipper'", he stated, "I like the way you handle the sails, I like to see

you enjoy this as much as I do."

Erin gave him a shy smile.

She stood up and went to the hatchway to get a coke. She turned back to Gibbs.

"Want some coffee?"

"Yes please."

When Erin was back, they sat silently, enjoying the ride. Erin kept an eye on the sails,

adjusting them every now and then for best performance. She observed the ocean and, warned

by the change in the wave-pattern on the surface, was already prepared when ever a squall hit

them.

"Where did you learn to sail so well" Gibbs asked, hoping this was a part of her past she

wouldn't mind talking about.

He was right.

"I work on boats a lot. It's my absolute favourite job."

"Yeah, I think sailing is one of those things: Either you love it or you hate it."

When they had returned to the marina after a thoroughly enjoyable day at sea, they packed up

the sails. Erin took the foresails over to a stretch of fresh mowed lawn to fold them. Gibbs

watched her from the boat. He knew it was not easy to handle sails this size alone, so he went

to help her. While they were working together, he again thought what a perfect team they

were. No communication needed, each of them knowing what had to be done.

It was already late, when they came back from the clubhouse. Gibbs took care of the dressings

on Erin's arm and when he was finished looked at her from close distance. Once again Erin

was stunned by the way he talked to her with his eyes.

She looked down.

"I'm ok, Skipper. Don't let his bother you more than it bothers me."

"So you're not that scared anymore?"

"No."

"That's good."


	6. Chapter 6

The next day, after they were done with boat cleaning, Gibbs took Erin to his house. Erin was

confused. Didn't he live on the 'Morning Glory'?"

Gibbs asked her to sit in the living room and when each of them had a fresh brewed cup of

coffee he told her why he stayed on the boat momentarily, about his work, that he'd have to

move back to the house once he went to the office again and that she of course could move

with him and stay in the spare bedroom.

Erin listened without any visible reaction. And yet Gibbs knew that she was not sure what to

think about it.

"Let me show you something."

He got up and Erin followed him to the basement.

Erin saw the unfinished boat and looked at Gibbs who ran his hand almost tenderly over the

soft wooden surface.

For a moment she could feel his hands on her own back, those strong, gentle hands.

Gibbs looked at her.

"What do you think?"

Erin stepped closer, viewing the hull from all angles.

"She'll be beautiful", she said, "strong and fast."

"How about helping me?"

Erin knew this would imply the answer to whether she would stay with him. And she was

surprised that he wanted her to help. This had to be pretty special to him.

She dared a look at him.

"Are you sure?"

"I wouldn't ask if I wasn't."

After a few more moments of inner fight, she gave in to her longing for a safe place to stay, to

leaving her self ordered reclusion.

"I'd love to help you."

Gibbs was relieved. He had sensed her inner struggle. He gave her his brightest smile.

"Great!"

He patted the boat.

"So, you got the chance to get finished before I'm too old to sail you."

On their way back to the marina Gibbs turned to Erin when they had to wait at a red light.

"Time for your check-up at Susan's tomorrow. That ok for you?"

Erin nodded her head.

"Yes, no problem."

And it really wasn't. Susan had already seen everything and she was female and friendly.

The next morning, after they were done with their chores on boat maintaining, Gibbs went for

his work-out again. On his way back, he stopped at the police station, to see if there was any

news about Erin's identity. There wasn't, and although the officer wanted to send out the

picture to every police station to see if someone would recognize her, Gibbs made a few calls

to find out what was needed to get an ID for her.

Gibbs suddenly felt the urge to talk to someone. "Strange things happen with me these days",

he thought. He didn't exactly have a reputation for being talkative. The first person that came

to his mind was Ducky. He called him and they met at Starbuck's not too far away from the

office.

"Jethro good to see you. And you look like the time off really did you well. I was a little

worried about whether you would be able to keep your mind off business and relax. But

obviously you did."

"Ducky, it's so good to see you again. Feels like it's been a year. How is everything going at

the office?"

"Fine. Nothing dramatic happened since you left. The bad guys seem to wait for you to come

back. This gave us the chance to catch up with paperwork at least. And you should see the

new pieces of art Abby created…"

"What is it? Crushed sculls, intestines, deadly viruses…?"

"A little of all of those, I suppose. So, Jethro, why exactly did you call? You didn't just want

to chat, did you?"

"No, although it's a pleasure."

Ducky started to look concerned now. This wasn't the grumpy old Gibbs he'd expected to

meet.

"I need your advice on something – or better said: someone."

"You got my full attention."

Gibbs told him everything that happened since he met Erin at the scene of the accident. Well,

not everything – he didn't mention his feelings for her. When he described the scars on Erin's

back, Ducky interrupted him.

"Describe the burn again, please."

Gibbs did, wondering, what Duck had stumbled over. He gave him a questioning look.

Ducky took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. Putting them back on again, he said:

"I'm not sure. This rings a bell in me. Just don't know where to put it right now. But I'm sure

I heard something like that before."

Ducky still seemed to be thinking about it, so Gibbs stayed silent.

"Well, I can't remember now. If it comes back, I'll tell you. You weren't finished yet."

Gibbs went on with his report. When he was finished, they sat without talking for a moment.

"Duck, I just don't know how to approach her. She has to talk about it. Somebody has to be

made responsible for all that. I mean, I know I could easily make her talk, but she would take

the first chance to leave if I did."

"And you don't want her to leave?"

"She has to stay until she got proper ID."

"You didn't answer my question, my friend. Which as far as I am concerned is enough of an

answer already."

Gibbs chose to leave that uncommented.

"Well, from what you told me, you're doing fine. She didn't run. And she agreed to move to

your house with you. I guess it just needs time. She might have a lifelong record of violence

and pain. I don't think there's anything you can do to make her trust you. And that's what it

comes down to. She needs to trust you. I'm afraid you might need a vast amount of patience

here, my friend. But then – maybe talking to a counsellor about it could be helpful."

"I'll think about that. Thanks for reassuring me, Ducky. I have to do this right, you know?"

"I guess I do. And I whish you and the lady luck. Am I going to meet her?"

"Yeah. If this works out the way I want it to, you will."

They talked about this and that for a while and then Gibbs said good bye. He went to pick up

Erin for her check-up at Susan's.

Susan confirmed that her arm was healing well. She was glad to see that Erin seemed to be in

a much more stable mental condition.

"You're doing fine, Jethro," she told him in a low voice when they were ready to leave.

Gibbs gave her a short hug.

"Tanks, Susan."

Over the next days, they settled into a routine of cleaning and maintaining the boat in the

mornings. Then Gibbs would go for his work-out and Erin took a nap or simply relaxed. She

frequently caught herself daydreaming about Gibbs. In these dreams, she was able to live out

all she didn't in reality. She could tell Gibbs everything that Ben did to her; she could trust

him to help her and she could find comfort in his arms. And of course in her dreams Gibbs

reacted just the way, she wanted him to. He believed her; he didn't condemn her, and he

offered and gave shelter and comfort.

"The good thing about day-dreams is, they always end the way you want them to," she

thought.

But even in real life, she felt better in his presence than she'd ever thought she would. He was

easy to be around. Of course she was careful not to let him catch her off guard. It was one

thing to dream about trusting him; doing so in real life was something completely different.

She knew this was kind of a time-out. And it would end. As soon as she'd got her new ID, or

Ben would demand to see her, it would be her on her own again anyway.

One day when Gibbs came back in the afternoon, he saw her standing at the end of the pier.

He walked up to her and stood beside her at the rail. She didn't look at him, nor did she talk.

After a while he gently asked her what she was thinking about.

Her eyes still on the scenery of the bay she started to answer.

"I…, I thought….."

She couldn't. He could sense she was troubled and gave her time to sort it out.

Erin knew he was waiting for an answer. He deserved an answer.

Barely above a whisper, she tried again.

"I just thought about how things would be…" her voice died off again.

He slowly put his hand on her shoulder and deliberately turned her around to face him.

"Erin…, Erin, look at me please."

She did, and the next thing she noticed were his arms wrapped around her, holding her.

"This can't be real," she thought. But leaning against his chest she could feel him breathing,

she could hear his heart beat.

Gibbs gently held her, all his senses tuned in to her, ready to release her the second she would

want to pull away.

"I can't change your past, Erin," he whispered close to her ear. "But I'm here for you now."

He raised one hand and caressed her hair.

"You don't have to go alone any more, if you don't want to."

Erin had barely heard him and it took a while for his words to sink in.

She felt like she'd lost control over her thoughts. Because otherwise she'd never be here in his

arms.

This had to be a day-dream. And if it was, then why not enjoy it as long as it lasted?

Gibbs wondered about her not reacting at all. He was glad she didn't pull back but he had no

clue to how she felt about this new situation. He had to look in her eyes. He took a step back

and held her at arms length. She looked confused; he could tell she didn't know what to think

at all.

"Erin, relax. You don't have to make decisions for life right now. I just want you to know,

that there'll always be a place in my arms for you," he said. "And in my heart," he thought.

Erin was in shock. This…was…no…dream! She had really been in Gibbs' arms and it had

felt so good, so safe. Not being able to look away she noticed the expression in Gibbs' eyes

change.

"Erin, are you ok?"

"Yeah…I guess…"

"Give her time to adjust," he reminded himself. He took his hands off her shoulders and

motioned to the marina.

"Let's walk a few steps," he suggested.

Turning around he reached out a hand for her and she took it without thinking.

Next day, when he was running, his cell phone rang. He hurried to answer, because he

thought it might be Erin needing him back on the boat. The display told him it was Abby

calling.


	7. Chapter 7

"Hi, Abbs, how's it going?...Really?...Yeah, Ducky told me….We met a few days

ago….That's a good idea, you'll meet Erin then……No, she's been staying with me for a

while….No, not really…Might turn out that way though….You bet she is!...Chinese will be

fine."

Back on the boat he told Erin.

"Abby is going to visit us tonight. She runs the lab at NCIS. She's a pretty interesting

character. Brilliant at work and fun to be around. I think the two of you will get along well."

He hoped they would. Erin definitely needed some friends and in his eyes Abby was highly

qualified.

They spent the time left with a game of chess, and Gibbs wound up thinking that maybe he'd

taught her too well. She gave him a hard fight and won two out of five games.

Just as they were finished, Abby came down the footbridge, swinging the plastic bag that held

the Chinese food so that Gibbs hoped it didn't contain soup.

He stood up and took the bag so that Abby could climb on board. They hugged hello.

"Abbs, I've been missing you."

"Yeah, me too. NCIS is not the same without my grumpy old boss-man."

"Abby, this is Erin – Erin, Abby."

Abby stepped down into the cockpit, gave Erin a bright smile.

"Hi, nice to meet you."

"My pleasure." They shook hands.

"How did you two meet?" Abby asked inquisitively.

Gibbs jumped in.

"We both came by a car accident and helped get the people out. And since Erin hadn't found a

place to stay yet, we thought she might as well stay here on the boat with me."

Erin was glad he left it at that.

They sat down to eat, Abby filling Gibbs in about the latest bureau gossip. She noticed Gibbs

attitude was completely different from how he was at the office. He was relaxed, easy-going

and she was ready to bet on something going on between him and Erin.

Later when Erin had left for the bathroom Abby told Gibbs about a case they almost had that

day.

"A female lieutenant was found dead in one of the boat houses at the naval academy. Tony

and Kate went to look at it, and since they couldn't find any cause for her death took her to

Ducky. Obviously she'd been raped shortly before she died. And then we found it was a

suicide. Overdose of sleeping pills. But we couldn't find any kind of DNA except of her own.

No sperm, no fibres, nothing. There are no witnesses, nobody knew of a fight or anything else

that might give us a clue. Don't think we're going to be able to track him down."

"You know that happens from time to time Abby."

"Yeah, I do. But it's frustrating."

She looked at Gibbs.

"What's going on between you and Erin?"

"Nice interrogation technique, Abby. Sudden change of subject."

"You're not going to tell me?"

"No!"

But Abby wouldn't be Abby if she gave up this easily.

When Erin came back, she invited her to go out for a good set of "girls-talk".

Erin liked Abby. She was smart and humorous. She looked at Gibbs who nodded approvingly.

"Sounds like a good idea," she answered.

"Let's see…tomorrow I'm at the "Vampire's". How about Friday?

"Sure."

Gibbs offered to bring her to Abby's place.

"I'll go, check on the house. Abbs can drop you off there."

"Ok, then," she gave Erin a smile, "it's Friday night for the girls…hey, I think I got to go.

Have to be in the lab on time tomorrow and my coffin's waiting for me."

They hugged and Abby "danced" back to her car.

"Wow!"

Erin looked at Gibbs.

"Yeah, that describes Abby."

"What was she saying about a coffin waiting for her?"

"She sleeps in one."

"No – but then, why not? I like her."

"That's good. I hope you and her can become friends."

They had collected all the left-overs and packaging and Erin picked up the plastic bag.

"Let me take this to the dumpster. I need to walk a few steps."

Gibbs looked at her. She had not actually said "alone", but he'd heard it anyway.

Erin didn't wait for an answer but stepped off the boat and walked along the foot-bridge.

When she came back, she didn't climb back on board, but went to the end of the bridge and

stood there, observing the nighttime scenery.

Minutes ago, when Abby had left, she'd suddenly been overcome by a big black wave of

sadness and loneliness. It had seemingly come out of no where and she'd had to get away

from Gibbs who would eventually have noticed and asked her what was on her mind.

And how should she explain to him what she didn't understand herself.

Maybe the problem was her feeling too good. The way Gibbs acted towards her, the fact that

she was as close to feeling safe as she'd ever been, the idea of Abby and her being friends, all

this made her feel better than she ever had felt in her whole life. And then, in the short

moment of silence after Abby had left the 'Morning Glory' she had realized that this was like

a day-dream. This was not her life; this would end as soon as Ben called for her. The big

black wave came rolling in.

Gibbs had watched her standing motionless, hands in her pockets, staring into the dark and

looking so completely lost he could actually hear her silent cry for help.

He left the boat and walked up to her.

"Hey sailor…" he softly whispered, standing behind her.

She hadn't heard him come but she had sensed his warm body standing behind her before he

spoke.

"Are you ok?"

She took a deep breath.

"Yes, sure."

"You suddenly looked so sad…." He gently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Is there

anything I can do for you?"

How could it feel so good to have him standing so close?

Gibbs slowly reached out and embraced her from behind. He felt Erin stiffen and opened up

his arms a little to give her more room.

"Shhh….easy." His words were barely to be heard; just a breeze in her hair.

Erin knew it wasn't wise to find comfort in this illusion of a new life. But Ben was then and

Gibbs was now.

She relaxed and leaned against Gibbs' chest as he tightened his grip around her. She soaked

up the warmth he gave, savoured this moment of feeling safe and protected.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thank you all so much for your kind reviews! I keep telling myself that I write for my own pleasure but have to admit that getting positive responses is a very effective way to make me write more and faster. So, as a 'thank you' I've posted the next chapter already. (Didn't want to do so this soon, but you made my day, so you deserve it!)

The next day greeted them with sunshine and a nice and steady breeze. The decision to go

sailing was made in a split second. They were prepared, supplied and ready to go in no more

than thirty minutes.

Gibbs had found Erin still being in a pretty contemplative mood when they got up, and was

glad to see how much being out on the bay again cheered her up.

Round noon, they let the 'Morning Glory' run before the wind and Gibbs motioned for her to

sit beside him. She did, although she tensed a little, wondering about what he had in mind.

He could see she was fighting an inner battle, torn between the need for comfort and love and

the necessity to protect herself against a world she only knew as hostile and frightening.

"Not easy, hm?"

She could feel his gaze on her. She shook her head.

"Am I pushing too hard?"

Something in his voice made her want to cry.

"No," she whispered.

"That's good."

He reached out and gently rubbed her back.

"No need to be strong out here. There's nobody here who can hurt you – or do you think I

would?"

She shrugged her shoulders.

"I guess not."

"You guess? I hoped you'd know that by now. But then – the bad guys got some thirty-five

years on me, right?"

He was stroking her hair now.

"How did you manage not to become an alcoholic or drug addict? I know, people commit

suicide for much less than what you've been through."

His hands were on her back again.

"Daydreams."

He almost didn't hear her.

"Daydreams? So you create your own imaginary world?"

She nodded her head, already regretting she told him. He had to think she was immature and

foolish.

"What happens in those dreams?"

Erin knew she couldn't tell him. She didn't have to.

Gibbs gently pulled her back so that she leaned against him. One hand still on the tiller he

wrapped his arm around her.

He placed a light kiss on her head.

"They sometimes come true, you know?" he whispered.

Erin knew this wasn't true for her. She would have to leave some day soon. But this felt so

good. She gave up her fight and snuggled up to Gibbs.

He noticed her relax.

"It will all be ok, you'll see."

"Yeah," she though. "It will; you just got to stop the world from turning."

x

Abby met Erin in the door to her flat, when Gibbs dropped her off the next evening.

"As much as I would like to appear to be courteous, I'm not going to invite you in, Boss."

She gave him a conspirative smile.

"Erin and I have some serious girl-talk to do. I'm sure you understand that you can not be part

of it?"

"No problem Abbs. Just call me when you want me to pick her up again."

"I will. See you then."

"Bye you two, have fun."

Abby turned to Erin and led her to the living area of her flat. Erin looked around. This was

Abby to the core. The entire room was held in black and red. Lots of leather and strange

accessories. Artificial spider-webs, lamps in form of skulls and even a tombstone in one

corner of the room.

"So, what did you do with my boss-man?"

They sat on the couch.

"What do you mean?"

"He is completely different from how we know him at the office."

"I which respect?"

"Gibbs is a workaholic. He never gives anybody slack. He's sharp as a razor's edge. Word

goes the second "B" in his last name stands for 'Bastard'."

"Hard to believe."

"Exactly. You must have done something to turn this maniac into the mild, soft-spoken and

relaxed man I met on the boat and today."

"I didn't. I don't make people do anything. And I don't think anyone could manipulate the

skipper."

"The skipper? Now that's a great nick for Gibbs. And you're definitely right about nobody

being able to change him. He's been married three times. That tells a lot, doesn't it?"

"Is he married now?"

Abby gave Erin a curious look.

"No, his last wife hit him with a baseball-club."

"Ouch!"

"Yeah, big ouch! But he's used to it. The second one preferred a golf-club though."

"You're kidding."

"Nope. He doesn't tell what exactly happened, but he doesn't deny it either. So I guess it's

true. Want some coffee?"

While they had coffee, Abby tried to question Erin about her life. She was not too successful.

Erin just told her she was travelling around, taking jobs as crew on sailboats to make a living.

When they decided to go for a short walk and left the building, it had cooled down pretty

much and the wind was blowing hard.

Erin looked up, turned this way and that. To Abby it looked like she listened to something.

"What is it?"

"This is going to be bad. I think we should call Gibbs."

"Ok, back in then."

Abby called Gibbs number.

"Gibbs. Don't you two get along?"

"Yes we do. Your 'sailor' wants to talk to you." She handed Erin the phone.

"Hi."

"Hi Erin, everything fine?"

"Yeah, I'm ok. We just wanted to go for a walk. There's a storm coming up, a bad one I

think."

"Maybe we should better go back to the marina then?"

"That's what I thought."

"I'm on my way." With that he hung up.

When Gibbs had picked her up, he speeded back to the harbour. He wondered there was no

comment from Erin's side considering his driving.

"Do you drive?"

"Yes."

"I just wondered that you don't complain. My co-workers always do."

"Let them drive with me once, and they'll never say a word again."

Coming to a sliding stop he looked at her. There was a sparkle in her eyes that he liked a lot.

"Ok, let's hurry."

On their way to the 'Morning Glory' they saw some boats that had already come loose and

where drifting around in the harbour.

They used extra lines and fenders to secure the boat and helped some other owners do the

same afterwards.

The wind had even grown stronger and it had started to rain. When they went back to the boat

to change into dry clothes, they saw one of the other old sailing boats drift towards the cliffs

just outside the harbour.

"And another old beauty gets wrecked. It's the 'Spirit of Endeavour'. Why don't those people

pay a little more attention to safety?" Gibbs said regretful.

Erin had picked up the binoculars from the navigation table and took a closer look.

Then she opened one of the closets in the cockpit and took out a sheet line.

Gibbs looked at her, not knowing what she was up to.

"Can you bring me over in the zodiac?" she asked him.

He gave her a questioning look.

"I'll try to sail her out. The main sail is tied to the boom. I don't know where they stow their

sheets, so I take this one with me."

"You're crazy! This is never going to work."

"I have to try, Skipper. I can't just watch her get wrecked without trying to do something."

"No way I'll change your mind, right?"

"No!"

"I'll go with you."

"I'd rather have you stay in the zodiac. In case I don't make it I'll jump over board and you

can pick me up."

"That easy, ha? This is not a swimming pool."

"I don't wear a bikini, do I?"

Gibbs was stunned. The Erin he faced now was far from being scared and shy. She was

confident, strong and witty. She seemed to enjoy the challenge. He could easily relate to that.

Gibbs climbed into the dinghy that was tied to the stern and took the sheets from Erin.

Erin jumped in, and Gibbs started the outboard.

"I'll kill you if you drown, that's a promise."

Erin smiled. Gibbs couldn't believe it. She actually smiled.

"Fair enough," she said.


	9. Chapter 9

The hardest part was to get off the dinghy and on to the boat. Once she had managed Erin

uncovered the mainsail, fastened the sheet and went to the mast to hoist the sail.

Gibbs had backed the zodiac up a little and watched her work. She was fast and efficient,

determined to do what ever necessary to complete her task. She reminded him of him at work.

He was just that way when working on a case.

Erin had set the mainsail. The big sail area seemed to push the boat towards the cliffs even

faster. But then the boat picked up speed and started to respond to the rudder.

When Erin realized she would make it past the rocks, she looked where Gibbs was for the first

time since she'd got on board the 'Spirit'.

He was heading back to the 'Morning Glory'.

"Fine. He can't help me here anyway," she thought.

She knew there was no way she could sail the vessel back into the harbour. And she couldn't

start the engines either, because she had no key for the hatch and no ignition key.

So she would just sail way out into the bay, steer free of all land and wait until the wind eased

off enough to go back to the marina.

She settled for a long, cold night. She was soaking wet, and now that the adrenalin rush was

over started to freeze. But so what. She felt great. It was her, the boat, the wind and the sea.

When she heard a sound that didn't come from the wind or the sails she turned around and

saw a motor yacht approaching. It turned about in a save distance and she saw two men enter

a dinghy and steer in her direction. They had a pretty bumpy ride.

"Those guys must be insane," she thought.

When they came closer, she could see Gibbs sitting in the bow of the small vessel, holding on

for dear life. The guy who was handling the dinghy was a master of his craft. He managed to

get close enough for Gibbs to grab the railing and pull himself on board.

When he came aft to the cockpit, Erin shook her head.

"And you tell me, I'm crazy!"

"Well, seems like we make a perfect team! I got the keys."

He unlocked the hatch and went inside. After a few seconds he came back out.

"Think we can motor her in?"

"Yeah, should work."

Gibbs started the engine. Erin pointed the boat's nose in the wind and he took down the sail

and tied it to the boom. Then he came back into the cockpit, stood beside Erin, put one arm

around her and pulled her close.

"I'm glad I don't have to kill you!" He spoke over her head.

She laughed.

"So am I!"

"You are really having a good time, are you?"

"Yeah, sure. Aren't you too?"

Gibbs released her and took one step away to look at her.

"I might not have the chance to tell you once we're back, 'cause the folks there are going to

celebrate their new hero, so I'm telling you now: You are the bravest, nuttiest and most

amazing woman I've ever known."

Erin gave him a short glance.

"I take that as a compliment."

Gibbs stepped out of the cockpit to check the dock line. He stopped and turned to Erin.

"It is!"

With that he went to the bow to get everything ready for when they reached the harbour.

"Yeah," Erin thought, "I definitely feel good!"

When they had entered the port many people were there to help them secure the 'Spirit' in her

berth.

As soon as Gibbs and Erin had stepped off the boat they were surrounded by a cheering

crowd.

Erin didn't like being in the centre of attention and was glad it still rained pretty hard and

everybody wanted to find a dry place soon.

The last two people who stayed were the couple who owned the 'Spirit'.

They waited for Erin and Gibbs in front of the 'Morning Glory'.

"Hi, I'm Tom Jones and this is my wife Harriet. There's no way we can ever thank you

enough for what you did!"

Harriet gave Erin a big hug.

"Tom's grandfather had the boat built, and it's always been in his family. He would have been

heartbroken if we'd lost her."

Erin felt a little uncomfortable.

"I'm glad, we could help. Just were at the right place at the right time."

"I guess it's been a little more than that," Tom threw in. "There were quite a few people here

and you were the only ones brave or crazy enough to try that!"

He turned to Gibbs.

"You must be awfully proud of your wife, Sir."

Much to Erin's surprise, Gibbs didn't correct him but answered:

"You bet I am. She's one in a million."

She felt his gaze on her and blushed. Tom saved her.

"You're not by chance looking for a job?"

"What kind of job?" Gibbs inquired.

"We have to move to Denver for three years. I got an assignment there. We'd need someone

to look after the 'Spirit'."

Erin looked at Gibbs. That sounded too good.

Gibbs thought about it for a while and then arranged for the Jones' to visit them on the

'Morning Glory' the next afternoon to discuss details.

"We really have to go shower and change into dry clothes now," he said apologetically.

"Yes of course. We should have thought about that!"

They said good-bye and Erin and Gibbs collected what they needed and went to the club-

house. Erin still thought about what Gibbs had said when Mr Jones had talked about her as his, Gibbs,

wife. It made her proud, it felt good. And it unsettled and scared her at the same time.

When they arrived back on the boat, it had stopped to rain and the first indication of dawn was

showing. The wind was still blowing hard, even though the worst seemed to be over.

Erin sat on the berth beside the navigation table and watched as Gibbs cooked up some fresh

coffee. Now that she was warm and dry again, she realized how tired she was. It just didn't

seem right to retire to her cabin after their shared adventure.

Gibbs sat down shoulder to shoulder with her and handed her a mug.

"Are you still cold?"

"No, I'm fine, thanks."

They sat in comfortable silence for a while.

"What do you think about that job Mr Jones offered?" Gibbs voiced his thoughts.

"Sounds good to me." Erin stared at her mug.

"Yeah. You could take my truck to get here."

She didn't answer and Gibbs felt that she was back to being the way he'd known her before

the rescue-mission. He placed his mug on the table.

Moving slowly he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close.

"Hey, where is the self-confident dare-devil woman I was with tonight?"

He gently rubbed her arm.

"I don't know. Out on the bay, maybe."

Gibbs placed a kiss on her hair. Even her whisper had sounded sad. He took her mug and set it

on the table as well.

"Maybe we should go out tomorrow and see if we can find her for you?"

Tbc

( You review - I write!)


	10. Chapter 10

She softened a little and leaned into Gibbs as if trying to hide.

"She has to find me, I guess."

Gibbs moved a little so that he could embrace her with both arms.

"I'm sure, she will."

Erin stifled a yawn.

"Want to go to bed?"

Erin shook her head. No, she didn't. She wanted to stay in his arms forever. But maybe he

wanted to get some sleep. She attempted to sit up but Gibbs cautiously held her back.

"Don't go. I love to sit here holding you. Wanna try and rest your feet on the berth and take a

nap?"

Erin didn't think she'd be able to sleep with him being so close, but she liked the idea of

remaining in this comforting embrace a little longer. So she did as he had suggested and lay

there, listening to the wind and the sounds from the moored boats, once again whishing this

could last forever.

Gibbs felt her relax in his arms. He was deeply moved by this hint of beginning trust. He was

well aware of the fact that he most likely was the first man she'd ever let come so close out of

her own choice. It made him feel strong and proud. And he realized how much he had missed

to care for someone, to be there for someone who really needed him.

He remembered that this side of him had led to his first marriage. His first wife had really

needed him to care for her and protect her, to be her knight in shining armour.

But he had never dared to talk to her about his job, about things that had bothered him, about

the ugly sides of life he was confronted with regularly on his job. He had felt he couldn't

burden her with his problems and as a result she hadn't understood his moods and he'd felt he

hadn't got the back-up he'd expected to get in a marriage.

His second and third wives had been the direct opposite. They both were strong, self-

confident and independent women. But they didn't need him. They had a life of their own

also because he was working long, unpredictable hours. They didn't like him being protective,

didn't want him to take the lead when he was home. And he spent even more time at the

office, because he knew he wouldn't have the chance to live out the other side of his being at

home anyway. The outcome of this was: They felt neglected, got enraged at his apparent non-

reaction and finally hit him with a tool of their choice.

Gibbs smiled inwardly. He had just found the answer to one of the big questions in his life:

Why didn't his marriages work out, when he liked the concept so much?

He'd had to neglect one side of his being in each of his relationships.

And he also found the reason for his feelings towards Erin.

His instincts had been right. She was his perfect match.

She was strong, well organized, able and used to care for herself and willing to take the lead

in situations she knew she could handle. And at the same time she needed as much love, care

and comfort as he ever would be able to give.

He caressed her hair, barely touching her to make sure he wouldn't wake her up when the

words of an old song by Bill Withers came to his mind:

_Lean on me, when you're not strong_

_And I'll be your friend I'll help you carry on_

_For it won't be long, till I'm gonna need_

_Somebody to lean on._

He closed his eyes, enjoyed the feeling of Erin's warm body leaning against his and dozed

off, a content little smile on his face.

Some hours later, on his way back from his work-out at the gym, Gibbs' cell phone rang. It

was Abby.

"Hey Abs, what's up?"

"Hi skipper," she giggled. "Sorry, I couldn't help myself."

"Don't call me skipper unless you're a sailor," Gibbs returned.

He didn't sound angry at all and Abby once again wondered about how different he was from

the way she'd known him.

"I wanted to tell you yesterday, but it all went so fast when you had to go back to the harbour.

By the way…is everything ok out there?"

"Yeah. Erin pulled quite a stunt, I'll tell you sometime later. What did you want to tell me?"

"We got another one. Captain Tracy Howard. A guy dressed all black and wearing a mask and

gloves subdued her on her way back home from the academy. He beat her up badly and raped

her, but she's alive."

"Let me guess. No DNA found?"

"Right. Kate interviewed her. She couldn't describe him because it was dark and because of

the mask. Said he's over six feet tall, heavily built and white. And he told her to 'tell them the

Benjiman is back'."

"The Benjiman? Did you run that through the computer?"

"Yeah, sure. It's not like we don't work at all when you're not here. Couldn't find anything

helpful though. We don't even know if it's the same guy."

"I whished I could go back to work."

"I'll keep you informed, Boss."

"Thanks Abs. By the way… what do you think about Erin?"

"She's smart, focussed. I don't think she missed one single word I said while she was here.

And there's something about her….might sound a little weird, but you know me…"

"...Yeah?"

"She's got an old soul. That's about the only way I can describe it. When I look in her eyes I

get the feeling that she's seen much more than you normally do in one lifetime."

"You're wise beyond your age yourself, Abs."

"Well, thank you. Gibbs….?"

"Not now, Abby, but you'll be the first to know, promised!"

Gibbs had arrived at his house and they ended the call. Gibbs emptied his mailbox and found

what he had hoped for. A large envelope containing all the forms needed for Erin to get her

ID and a temporary driver's license, which was important if she decided on taking the job the

Jones' had offered.

After a quick check-up on the house and a short visit to his boat-to-be, he headed back to the

marina.


	11. Chapter 11

He found Erin sitting in the cockpit and polishing brass.

"Hey, always busy?"

"Why not? This is fun."

"Is it? Never looked at it that way. I like the effect but not the process."

Erin looked up and gave him a little whimsical smile.

"We could share it then: I enjoy the work and you enjoy the looks."

Gibbs returned the smile implying a touch of innuendo.

"I most definitely enjoy the looks! And I have to admit that though it's not very gentlemanly,

I like the concept."

He noticed her blush and look away.

"She got it," he thought. But, since he loved this game of verbal teasing and didn't want to

discourage her, he decided on changing the subject.

"I got the forms here we need for your new ID."

Erin suddenly felt alienated. Did he want her to leave?

"I'll feel much better once I can be sure that you stay because you want to and not because

you have to."

That took a load off her mind. But how had he known what she thought?

When Erin didn't react at all, Gibbs felt the need to dig a little deeper.

"Did you change your mind about staying and moving to my house with me?"

Erin shook her head.

"No." But she knew it was not her decision.

He was relieved to hear that.

"I'll bring some laundry up to the club-house. You could finish what you're doing and then

we can fill out these forms, ok?"

"Sure."

When Gibbs was back they sat at the table in the cockpit and he took the first sheet of paper.

"Let's see. I think we start with the easy ones….Height?"

"Five-foot-nine."

"Eye-colour? Pretty blue, I'd say, right?"

"Yep!"

"Colour of hair?"

"Dark-blonde."

"Do you know where you were born?"

"First city I remember is Dallas, Texas."

"Want to make that your birthplace?"

"Why not?"

"Date of birth?"

"I don't know."

"Pick a date. The year could be 1970, or would you rather be a little younger?"

"No, 1970 is fine. Easy to remember."

"We need a month and a day."

Erin thought about it for a while.

"I'll take October, 12th."

Gibbs didn't need a second to figure out why she chose that date. It was then they had met at

the scene of the accident.

"I love you, Erin," he thought.

He gave her a warm smile.

"Now, that's a date that _I_ can easily remember."

Erin wondered how he could make her feel so good, just by looking at her.

"On we go….Christian name?...You stick with Erin?"

"Yes,"

"Would you like a second one?"

"No, not really."

"Good….Last name?"

"I can not just take someone's last name as mine!"

"I think most last names are shared by many different people, not necessarily being relatives.

Maybe you shouldn't choose Rockefeller or Mozart or Picasso, but other than that…."

"There was an old couple I sailed with several times. They were really friendly and I guess

they wouldn't mind if I borrowed their last name. It would be Parker then."

"Erin Parker…not bad. Want me to write that down?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Ok, so far, so good. This will take a while, but the temporary driver's licence should be

ready by Tuesday."

"That easy?"

"If you know the right people…"

They had just finished the paper-work, when the Jones' came walking along the foot-bridge.

They agreed on Erin taking care of the 'Spirit of Endeavour' and that she could use her for

day sailing trips with tourists on the Chesapeake Bay. The Jones' wanted to go on a last

sailing trip for the next two days before they started the preparations for their relocation, so

Erin would be in charge from Tuesday on.

When they were sitting outside with their first mug of coffee the next morning, Gibbs' cell-

phone rang.

"Gibbs….Yes Sir….I understand….Yes Sir, I'll be there in about an hour."

Gibbs looked at Erin.

"Holidays are over. I need to go back to the office today. We have a case that obviously needs

to be taken care of fast."

Erin could see that he wasn't too sad about having to go back to work.

"Do you want me to drop you off at the house or would you rather stay here and I pick you up

in the evening?"

"I think I'll stay. I'll clean the 'Glory' and fix everything up."

"Good. I don't know when I'll be back. You can call me any time from the club-house. Have

you still got my card?"

He made a mental note to supply Erin with a cell-phone.

"Yes."

"Ok then. I got to go. I have to drop by at home and change into bureau clothes."

Gibbs had been ordered to go directly to the scene of the crime where he met the rest of his

team.

"Hey, Gibbs. Good to have you back!" Kate greeted him.

"Kate, Tony. What have we got here?"

"Female officer, found dead by Mr. Schuhmaker over there who took his dog for a walk. Call

came in one and a half hours ago. No witnesses and as far as we can say by now, no useful

evidence. Maybe Ducky's got something."

As Gibbs went over to Ducky who was examining the corpse, Kate turned to Tony.

"Wow! He's really happy to see us!"

"Yeah, eloquent and cheerful as ever."

Gibbs kneeled down beside Ducky.

"Hi, Duck, how's it goin'"

"Well, Jethro. Opposed to this young lady here, I'm doing fine."

"Anything you can tell me by now?"

"Time of death approximately 2230. Cause of death is the severe injury of the skull. Much

more damage has been done, but this fracture was lethal."

Gibbs looked at the dead officer. He didn't have to ask. The torn clothes and clearly visible

bruises told him what he wanted to know.

"Cover her up, Ducky, will you? I'll talk to Mr. Schuhmaker for a moment."

Not being able to find anything helpful, they headed back to the headquarters where Ducky

would try to find something that could be a lead.

They all gathered in Abby's lab to sum up what they knew so far.

"Ok, Kate. The first victim was found….."

"October, 22nd at 2320 on the South Carolina Ave.. It was a proven suicide but autopsy

showed that she'd been raped and beat up quite bad shortly before."

"Or maybe she had lived out strange sexual fantasies and didn't like the outcome." Tony

ventured.

Gibbs' look would have sent anyone with a lower self-esteem running.

"The next incident took place two days later?"

Again Kate reported after having checked her hand-held.

"October 24th. The victim survived and made it to the emergency on her own. The raid

happened around 2200 from what she recalled. She couldn't describe the attacker except of

that he was white, over six feet tall, was clad in black and wore a mask, gloves and used a

condom. And that he told her to, quote: 'Tell them the Benjiman is back'"

"Those two don't necessarily have to be connected," Gibbs stated.

Tony tried to make up for his faux-pas before.

"True. At that time it was just a mental note of two women, both serving at the naval

academy, having been raped in the same area, by an attacker that left no trace. But now, with

the third victim being a Navy officer, raped like the other two, no DNA or fibres or anything

found it's hard to believe it's not the same guy. There was no coverage in the press so I don't

think it was a copycat."


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: 1000 hits and a brand new review...Maybe I needed this reminder. This story has been "sleeping" for a while, but I think it just woke up.

"Looks like we got a serial rapist who doesn't mind killing his victims. And the fact that he

gave victim no.2 a message to deliver indicates that he'll strike again. If he sticks to his M.O.

his next assault will be on Tuesday. Kate…"

"Yes Gibbs?"

"Get out a warning to all female personal at the base and the academy."

"On it!"

"DiNozzo, I want you to check the records for Navy personal accused of sexual harassment

and/or rape. He said "Benjiman is back", so there must have been something before."

"Boss, we already…"

Gibbs cut him off. "Then do it again! I'll go have another interview with Captain Howard."

Unfortunately Tracy Howard didn't remember anything more than she had already reported.

Gibbs didn't like to be a situation where he had to wait for the dirt bag to make the next move.

On his way back to the headquarters he went to pick up Erin. He wanted her to meet the rest

of his team. As he had expected, Erin had the "Morning Glory" in perfect condition.

Everything cleaned and stowed away.

"I got to go back to work. Want to join me? Abby'll be there, and I want you to meet Ducky

and Kate and Tony."

Erin accepted, even though she was a little insecure about how to approach Gibbs' team. She

didn't know what he had told them about her. But she wanted to see Abby again, and finding

out where Gibbs worked and how he was on the job would add to the picture she had about

him.

Three hours later, entering Abby's lab, she wished she hadn't come here. Abby jumped off

her chair when she saw her.

"Erin, good to see you! How's it goin'?"

She gave Erin a big hug and went on without letting her answer.

"What kind of a stunt was that you pulled in that storm? Gibbs said he'd tell me, but he didn't

yet…..Erin, what's wrong?"

Erin was shaking. She looked at Abby with eyes wide open and seemed to be in some kind of

shock. Abby led her to her stool and made her sit down.

"Erin, what happened?"

Erin barely whispered. "I promised I'd stay with him…..but I can't……I didn't know…….but

I have to, I gave my word…"

"Erin, what are you talking about?"

"Gibbs….he's so ….different…."

Abby didn't understand.

"Different from what?", and then it came to her. "You mean he's different here from how he's

been on that boat?"

Erin nodded her head. "If I had known, I'd never…"

Abby could see the problem now; she just didn't really understand that extreme reaction on

Erin's side.

"Look, you got to know the private Gibbs first. And now the professional Gibbs is somewhat

different. I was equally surprised to see how relaxed and easy-going Gibbs was on that boat.

Guess my surprise was a bit more a pleasant one than yours, right?"

Erin didn't answer that and Abby started to really get worried.

"Hey, don't you want to tell me what's bothering you so much? You look like you've been

sent on death-row."

Erin just sat there and stared into nothing. Abby wasn't even sure if she'd heard her.

"I mean….on that boat, I got the impression that you and Gibbs were…."

Gibbs, who had just arrived in the lab, interrupted her.

"Were what?"

Abby looked at him and he could see concern in her eyes.

"Nothing. It's none of my business, I guess…"

"Hm… Erin, you need to go upstairs. Your drivers licence is there and you need to sign it."

Erin got up and left without looking at him or saying a word.

"Abby, what happened?"

"I hoped you could tell me. She came here and was practically a nervous wreck. It took me a

while to see it, but now it's clear to me. You really should have warned her…"

"Warned her of what, Abbs?"

"The way you are at the office. You scared her. She knew you as the laid back and friendly

man you obviously were on that boat and now faces the fact that she's going home with a

sarcastic, impatient and aloof special agent. I just can't figure out way she takes it that bad..."

"There's a reason for that, believe me. Damn….I should have thought about it."

He turned to leave.

"I'll take care of it Abbs, thanks."

He followed Erin up to the bullpen. Since there was nothing they could do about the case at

this time, he told Tony and Kate that they could leave after they finished what they were

working on and motioned for Erin to follow him. She still hadn't looked at him, hadn't said a

word. Erin felt dazed. She hardly noticed what was going on around her. She knew she had

just lost something very special, something she'd never dreamed she'd have. And while living

without it had not been a problem before, she wasn't sure if she could do it again, now that

she had an idea of how things could be. And what scared her most was that she was not ready

to give it up completely. She didn't want to believe that her dream was already over.

On their way to the car Gibbs thought about how he could best explain to Erin what was

going on. But as uneasy as she seemed to feel at the moment, he would probably not be able

to get through to her. He made a decision and headed for the marina instead of home. Maybe

being back in the surrounding where she had felt comfortable being with him would help.

Erin sat beside him, motionless. If she was surprised that he drove to the marina, she didn't

show it. After he had parked the car, he led the way to the "Morning Glory". They stepped on

board and he asked Erin to sit down in the cockpit. He sat opposite of her and looked at her

for quite a while. She stared at her hands, didn't move, didn't ask why he had brought her

back here. Gibbs leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees.

"Erin, I'm sorry!"

Erin heard him. She wanted to look up, look in his eyes and see her skipper. But she couldn't.

A nasty little voice inside her head warned her not to trust him.

"I should have told you I am different at work than I am as a private person, should have

prepared you for meeting special agent Gibbs."

"Don't listen to him!" The voice grew louder.

"I wish I could turn back time and start again at the point where I picked you up and took you

to the office with me. If I could, I'd use the time driving there to introduce you to agent

Gibbs."

She really wanted to believe him but the fight wasn't over yet.

"I know he sounds just like your skipper right now, but he isn't. Your skipper was just a

dream, not real. Don't let him fool you; you'll only get hurt again."

She didn't want to listen to that inner voice but then, it had served her well before. And it was

true. This whole episode on the boat had been like a dream. And she had always known that it

would end someday.

Gibbs sensed her inner battle. He realized how little he knew about the life she'd lived before

they had met. And how fragile and precious her beginning trust in him had been. He was not

ready to give her up yet.

"Erin, look at me please."

She wanted to.

"Don't!" her inner voice warned her.

She didn't want to give up her dream.

"It's a trick! Don't let him fool you."

She didn't want to be alone again. She knew there was not enough strength left in her to fight

much longer. She felt torn between her need for the warmth and comfort that Gibbs had

introduced her to and that nasty little voice reminding her of the ghosts of her past.

"Look, I can't change what happened today. I wish I could, believe me. I can only assure you

that I'm still the same person you knew here on the boat. At the office, at work, I am focussed

on my work. I try to cut out emotions because they might influence my judgement. When you

deal with murder and all the other ugly facts of life that we are confronted with, you either do

it matter-of-factly or you won't last long. But that has nothing to do with you or the way I am

when I'm with you. There's no way I can prove that right now. You'll just have to believe me.

And you've got to make a decision. You have got to decide whether you want to give us a

chance or let him win. I mean he, whoever he is, is not even here and still he seems to control

your thoughts. And only you can stop him from doing that. I want to help you and back you

up. I want to be the man that you need by your side, but I can't do anything as long as you let

him be in control."

Erin still hadn't moved. Gibbs got up. He knew there was nothing more he could say or do.

"I'll be in the club-house for twenty minutes. If you're not there by then, I'll leave your bag at

the counter."

He needed every bit of self-control to keep from just hugging and holding her. But he knew it

had to be her choice. She had to break the spell of that bastard that had made her life hell.

Will be continued...


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: I always intended to finish this story. Just thought I could take my time. But of course, if I know someone is waiting on how this goes on I'll speed it up a bit. Thanks for the friendly review.

X

He stepped off the boat and went to the clubhouse.

Erin felt numb. But at the same time her mind was racing. She tried to understand what had

happened in the last hours. This morning everything had been fine. She had felt comfortable,

had enjoyed this new way of life that was too good to be hers. Part of her wanted to and could

believe that this could be true for her. That she really could stay with Gibbs, feel save and

look into the future with a smile. But of course she had always reminded herself, that this was

not real. Facing the fact that it was over was something completely different though.

She just now realised how much she had hoped all this could be true. And she had to face the

fact that she didn't want to continue living her life the way it had been before she'd met

Gibbs. She didn't want to be alone again, didn't want to have to watch her back all the time.

She knew she wouldn't be able to stand that again. Ben would find her. He always had. There

was no place safe enough to hide. She closed her eyes. She really didn't know what to do.

Maybe she should just sit here and wait until it was over. Just when she was ready to give up,

when she gave in to the inevitable, her mind started to wander off.

She saw Gibbs sitting at the helm of the "Morning Glory", totally at one with himself,

enjoying a day at sea. She saw him approaching the "Spirit" on that small outboard in the

storm. She saw herself resting comfortably in his arms. Saw them work together on the boat.

The last days with Gibbs passed before her eyes, like she was no part of it, like she was just

an observer. And yet, she was part of it. She could feel his arms around her, feel his warmth.

She recalled the way he'd looked at her, all the things he had said just by talking with his

eyes.

She tried to hold on to these memories when reality dropped in again. She didn't want to

wake up; she wanted to stay in this dream forever.

And then she realized, that looking back, she was not afraid of him. She had not been

prepared for the way she saw him at the office today. It had been a shock, but it was not in her

dream.

A bit calmer now, she had to admit that he had not acted different towards her than he had

before. Agent Gibbs and her skipper were two sides of his personality and had always been.

And she knew for sure that the skipper might be the only chance she'd ever have to change

her life. If anyone was strong enough to stand up to Ben, it was Gibbs.

For the first time in her life, she found she had the chance to make a choice. All she had to do

was to go up to the clubhouse. All she had to do was to ignore that nasty little voice that told

her not to trust Gibbs.

She had never thought about changing her life, because there never had been a chance to do

so.

And if this was the chance she had, she would take it. "Break Ben's spell", she knew it was

not that easy. Ben was not only past, he was also future. She would have to tell Gibbs about

him, at the latest when he demanded to see her the next time. But not now.

She got up and slowly went to the clubhouse. With every step the knot in her stomach grew.

How would he react? Or was she late already?

When she entered she saw Gibbs standing at the counter and talking to the clerk. She hesitated

and just when her feet had decided to turn and walk away, Gibbs turned around.

Their eyes met and the way he looked at her was the lifeline she needed to make the last steps.

When she had reached him, he slowly raised his right hand and ever so gentle touched her

cheek, never breaking eye-contact.

"Ready to go home?" he asked.

"I already am home," she answered, and she was.

Will be continued


	14. Chapter 14

Erin opened her eyes. It was already getting dark and she was cold. She wrapped her arms

around herself and looked around. She had been happy here, or at least the closest to happy

that she'd ever been. And it was over. She tried to figure out how she felt. There was nothing.

No pain, no regrets, no sadness. She felt empty.

"Back to normal," she thought and got up. She stepped off the boat and went to the club-

house without looking back.

At the counter the clerk greeted her with a smile.

"Hi Erin. You came to pick up your bag, right?"

"Yes. Could you give me something to write? I need to drop a note for the Jones' of the

"Spirit of Endeavour"."

"Sure, here you are."

"Thanks"

She wrote a few lines explaining she had to leave and that she was sorry but she wouldn't be

able to look after their boat. She folded the sheet of paper and handed it to the clerk.

"Could you…"

"No Problem. Here's your bag."

"Thank You. Bye"

"Bye. Come visit us when you are somewhere in the area."

"I will."

With that she picked up her bag and left the club-house.

She took a bus to the railway station. She would travel south, Florida maybe, not that it mattered.

At the depot, she opened her bag to take out a warmer jacket and saw a white envelope on top

of her clothes. It had just one word on it: Erin.

Her heart stopped. The skipper! She sat down on one of the benches and stared at the

envelope in her hands. Her mind raced. What did he want? She knew she had disappointed

him by not showing up at the club-house. Why didn't he just leave her alone? Maybe she

should throw this note away. Pretend she never got it. But she couldn't do that. What if

he…..She blamed herself for being a fool to hope he would want to see her again. But if he

did, what would she do? Leaving she realized, had been painful. Too painful to allow these

feelings to sink in. If she met him again, and she would have to leave again……

But why should he want to give her another chance, after what she did? Erin felt like she was

about to faint. She had to know. This had to end or she would go insane. She opened the

envelope and took out a single sheet of paper.

The writing looked blurred and she had to wipe her eyes to get a clear view. When had she

started to cry?

The message was short. One line, six words that changed everything.

"If you need me, call. Anytime."

She could see Gibbs writing that. She could hear him saying it.

She knew what she had to do. She went to a pay-phone and dialled his number. Her heartbeat

was so loud, she was afraid she wouldn't be able to hear him.

"Gibbs."

She couldn't answer. She held on to the receiver like her life depended on it.

"Erin, is that you?"

She had no control over her voice. Tears streamed down her face and she couldn't stop them.

She knew she had to say something but she wasn't able to.

"Erin, where are you?"

"The depot," she managed to whisper.

"Stay there. Don't go away."

Erin had to concentrate on breathing. She could hear a door slam shut.

"You still there?"

"Yes."

"Good," a car engine was started. "Don't hang up, okay?"

Erin wiped her eyes again. Why couldn't she stop crying?

"Erin, are you okay?"

"Yeah." She had to clear her throat.

"Stay on the phone with me. I'm with you any minute."

She could hear he was going fast. She was afraid she would wake up and find this was another

daydream.

"Erin, where exactly are you?"

"At the pay-phone by the ticket-counter."

"Okay," the engine was turned off. "I'll hang up now. Stay where you are."

Erin went back to her bag. At least she had been able to stop that flood of tears. Just as she

wanted to sit down, she saw him. She wanted to run. To run away, to run to him. She wanted

to wake up and realize it was another daydream and she wanted this to be true.

And it was true. Gibbs was standing in front of her.

He slowly raised his right hand and ever so gentle touched her cheek.

Erin looked up and met his eyes. Ocean-blue. Sky-blue. This was real.

"Ready to go home?" he asked.

It was her daydream. But this time she wouldn't wake up and find she was alone. She felt the

tears starting to well up again, but she didn't care.

"Yes, I am," she said.

And then she was in his arms and he held her as she cried.

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: Sorry that this chapter is so short. I'm already working on the next part, so the wait should not be too long.

The next morning, after Gibbs had left for work, Erin sat in the living room and thought about

the last hours. When they had come home last night, she had immediately fallen into an

exhausted, agitated sleep in the spare bedroom after a quick call to the club-house to make

sure that note to the Jones' was thrown away. In the morning, she'd stood up when she had

heard Gibbs potter about around in the kitchen. While they had coffee, he had provided her

with keys for the house and the old pick-up truck. They hadn't talked about the last day and

Erin was not sure if she wanted to at all. She would not bring the subject up for sure.

She had felt awkward in Gibbs' presence this morning. She didn't know what he expected her

to do, what he expected their "relationship" to be like. In those last days on the "Glory", there

had been more than one occasion, when Erin noticed that he looked at her in a certain way.

And while on one hand it felt good, here in this new situation definitely was on the other

hand. On the boat, he was the skipper and she was the sailor. That was easy, she could handle

that. And if, from time to time he would give hints, that he saw and liked her as a woman, she

could handle it. Because he still was the skipper and she was the sailor. Common ground.

But here, the only thing that was left for her to be was a woman. And if he was not the skipper

anymore, what was he then? Erin knew she would go crazy if she didn't manage to get her

mind of thoughts like these. She grabbed her jacket and drove to the marina, to start working

on the "Spirit of Endeavour".

At the same time, at the NCIS headquarters, special agent Gibbs had to face the fact that their

serial rapist had done it again. After they had investigated the crime-scene, Gibbs ordered

Kate and Tony to try and find other witnesses and talk to the young seaman's friends and

roommates.

He drove to Bethesda hospital to interview Grace Mallory, who had the misfortune of having

become victim number four.

Having arrived there, he was told that the doctors were still treating seaman Mallory and that

he would have to wait, so he went to the cafeteria for coffee.

After something like twenty minutes a nurse came down to tell him that he could now see the

victim. When he entered the room, he could immediately see that the woman had been beat up

badly. He grabbed a chair and sat down beside the bed.

"Hi, I'm special agent Gibbs, NCIS. I'm sorry for what happened to you."

Seaman Mallory didn't answer. She just looked at him and he could see the pain and fear in

her eyes.

"I know this is hard, but I need you to tell me everything that you remember. You're the fourth

victim of this guy, and I have to stop him as fast as possible."

She slowly nodded her head.

"Did you see the attacker?"

"He was clad in black. He was tall. And overweight. White……"

"Take your time. Was there anything else you noticed?"

"He wore a mask, like you wear under a helmet for motorbikes. And gloves. I could feel he

had a ring on his right hand, when he hit me….."

"Did he say anything?"

She looked surprised but didn't answer.

"He said something to one of the other victims. Did he talk to you?"

"It didn't make sense to me… he said: "Tell them hello from the Benjiman". But he didn't say

whom I should tell it."

"Anything special about his voice?"

"Deep. He had a bad breath. And an accent. He had a slight British accent."

"That all you can remember?"

"I'm sorry…."

"No, it's okay. You did good."

He handed her his card.

"If you think of anything else, call."

"Okay."

"Does your family know what happened?"

"My mom is on her way here."

"Okay. Thank you."

Gibbs was not surprised, that Kate and Tony's interviews had not lead to any new insight.

This case was frustrating. He hated to have to wait for the attacker to make a mistake.

X

Erin was already at home, when he arrived in the evening. She opened the door when she

heard him pull up into the driveway. When he had reached her, he could see how insecure

about the new situation she was.

"Hi, let me go take a quick shower. Maybe I can leave some of special agent Gibbs there. I'm

not going to make that same mistake again, you know."

Erin looked down.

"I know now. I'm sorry for the fuss I made."

"Don't be. We both have to adjust to this new situation."

After he had showered, they had the steak and salad that Erin had prepared and then spent a

few hours working on his boat. They didn't talk much, but the silence was comfortable and

Erin felt much better when she went to bed that evening.

When Gibbs arrived at the office the next morning, Ducky already waited for him at his desk.

"Ducky. Anything wrong?"

"You surely remember that I told you I thought I heard something like that before, when you

told me about that brand your Erin has on her shoulder."

"Yes?"

"I know now. I know where I saw it."


End file.
